Yes. That’s how I strongly feel.
Korean congregations, for the most part, are not pastor friendly. It’s ridiculous of what they expect and want from their pastors.
There’s no room for error nor grace.
Many Korean pastors I know sacrifice their families to run their ministries. That’s a ridiculous concept. Some pastors I know even glorify their decision. In my opinion, that is NOT the way to do things, because ministry starts at home. But the more I am involved in Korean congregations, the more I see that, for the majority of the Korean pastors, there is no room to serve both family and ministry because of the demands that the people put on them.
This is what I feel, that the church knows they are not perfect, but they don’t really want to be. They’d rather see it in their leader.
The congregation drives around in a BMW. The pastor bought a volvo, the congregation complained that a volvo is too pricey of a car for the pastor to drive. if the pastor has enough money to buy a volvo, the church is paying the pastor too much.
The congregation carry designer purses such as Coach etc. The pastor’s wife carries around a real Louis Vuitton and the congregation believes that the pastor’s wife should carry fake bags at best.
The congregation, expects, no demands, that they have vacation time from their jobs. But refuses to see why their pastor needs to take vacations.
I’m actually afraid to go and ask how many weeks of vacation I get in a year, since I’m not appointed and a local church hire.
Even more to actually say I’m going on vacation because the senior pastor doesn’t take one (WHICH IS FREAKING RIDICULOUS!!!!!!), either because he can’t nor he doesn’t want to (WHICH IS STILL FRIGGIN RIDICULOUS!!!).
This is why many second generation Korean pastors leave the Korean congregation or the ministry altogether, because people should not and cannot function in such conditions.
Korean pastors with healthy families seem rare and that is saddening.
I know that there are problems within all cultures and congregations. This is just one of the bigger ones in my context and I wish there were ways to teach the Korean congregation that pastors are human, pastors make mistakes, pastors have the same (similar) needs and desires as everyone else.
A part of me is praying that after I get ordained, I will not have anything to do with the Korean church. This thought saddens me.