Here is David fleeing from Saul. Here is Saul chasing David all over the world.
While I was reading this, a question came up. Saul’s been after David for a long time. Who’s running the kingdom? Who’s looking after the people of Israel? It definitely wasn’t Saul. Saul was too busy pursuing his own personal goals and agendas.
Not only did Saul, in my opinion, abandoned his kingdom for his personal pursuit, but his obsession with killing David led to him abandoning his sanity. That’s the only thing I could think of when he killed the prophets for letting David go. Yea, Saul sunk that low.
It’s easy to judge him and say Saul lost it. His jealousy of David and obsession of killing David led him to, really lose his humanity and sanity. So it’s not difficult to shake our heads and say, Saul should’ve just let go.
But, I see a lot of Saul in me. In all of us, if we’re honest with ourselves. How many times have my personal goals got in the way of God’s will?
There are many times where I was envious of someone and went out of my way to make them look bad and make myself look good. There are times when someone wronged me, and my one and only thought was to redeem and avenge myself.
And the thing is, these thoughts do become obsessive. And it does get out of control, fast. It may start out as hurt and anger for being wronged. Then it leads to a desire to see them fail or see them get hurt. Then that desire leads us to be the cause of their hurt or failure. And then that desire leads to be obsessive until we have reached our goal. Only to have ourselves feeling empty and angrier. What would’ve happened if Saul did get a hold of David? I really don’t think Saul would’ve felt better. In fact, I think Saul would’ve felt remorseful and regretful. He would have innocent blood on his hands, and I don’t see it out of the question that Saul would do something crazier, like kill himself or his son after he achieved his goal of killing David.
And how many times have I put aside my call from God to pursue my personal goal? So many times. I see a lot of Saul within me. So I can’t judge Saul or call him foolish, because I do the same things.