Guilt is a Funny Thing

I am tired. Long day. If the following post doesn’t make sense, or if it’s just plain silly/weird, now you know why.
*end disclaimer*

I had to stop by church late tonight. Clean out my office space. Finish up some last touches for tomorrow.

I got in my car, excited to finally end the day and just watch a little late night Sportscenter and stuff.
As I was pulling out of the parking lot of the church, a small baby gecko jumped out under from my windshield wiper.
As I was driving away, it was panicking. It jumped all over the hood and on to the windshield. (I would’ve been better off paying attention to the road.)

I started speeding up a little, just to see what would happen.
As I saw the gecko scared and panicking, a thought hit me. What if he was just playing outside with his friends? And now he’s totally screwed and separated from family and friends. What if he ends up in the parking lot of our apartment building and dies, because he has no idea where he is or what to do?
Will he ever find his way home?

Then I started feeling really guilty about the possibility of separating him from his loved ones (I don’t know why I determined he was a male) and was going to turn around and go back to the church parking lot when… yea. He flew off my car. Now my mind was racing to consider the new possibilities. What if he broke a leg and can’t move? There were a lot of cats in that area. What if he becomes cat food? But I couldn’t stop because of the traffic.

The drive from church to home, late at night, is about 7 minutes. The entire time, I couldn’t stop thinking about the gecko. And I wished that I stopped when I first saw the gecko.

2 thoughts on “Guilt is a Funny Thing

  1. wow. i laughed when my brother told me his friend’s kitten got run over. you cried (a little, i know) inside about a gecko that BROUGHT himself onto your car and then jumped off at his will (hmm…maybe not at his will…).
    gosh, pj. you’re such a softie. if this makes you feel any better, at least you didn’t like take it all the way home, cook it, and eat it. 😉
    *disclaimer about the cooking and eating part* it’s really late/early here. O.O and…im hungry.

    i miss you pj!! im leaving for camp on wednesday! >.< when will i EVER get to see you again???
    p.s. i think jeyin’s thinking about going to your new church. =)

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