Just For Fun

Don’t you think that professional athletes should be forced to learn how to articulate or hire a speaking coach?
I recently heard Chris Johnson (Tennessee Titans running back) on ESPN radio (Tirico and Van Pelt Show) and couldn’t understand a word he was saying. He mumbled, and every other word was ‘you know.’ (i.e. how do you like coach Fisher? Johnson’s response: you know, he’s a real great guy, you know. he’s intense, and you know, he’s tough, but you know, he needs to so that, you know, we do our jobs. He’s a great coach, you know. I love playing for him and for this team, you know.) (fyi, i just made that up, but you know, it’s not that much different from what he said, you know. Except that you could understand what I wrote, since, you know, you couldn’t really understand what he was actually saying. And it’s just not him, you know, that uses the ‘you know’ or the ‘like’ a lot. It’s a lot of these athletes. you know.)

Anyway, here are some of my favorite sports quotes:

“I’ve never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body.” – Winston Bennett, University of Kentucky basketball forward.

“We’re going to turn this team around 360 degrees.” – Jason Kidd, upon his drafting to the Dallas Mavericks.

“I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father”
-Greg Norman

“I can’t really remember the names of the clubs that we went to.” – Shaquille O’Neal on whether he had visited the Parthenon during his visit to Greece

“The term ‘genius’ is inapplicable to anyone in this game. A genius is Norman Einstein.” – Joe Theismann

Why does Emmitt Smith still have a job at ESPN?
Here are some Emmitt Nuggets:
“Wade [Phillips] inherit this success.”
“The Packers don’t has a running game.”
“Wes Worker is a possession receiver that make things happen.” (The name is Wes Welker)
“Norv Turner have a lot of experience in the playoff.” (Turner’s record in the playoffs were 1-1)
“Reggie Bush is definitely effective. Just not tonight.” (Good point. Except, Reggie Bush didn’t play at all in that game due to injury)

Okay. I know this was kinda mean and not very “pastoral” in making fun of Emmitt Smith and these other athletes. Lord knows I’ve said some stupid stuff here and there.
But, I needed a good laugh. 🙂

One thought on “Just For Fun

  1. i completely agree with every single word you wrote. haha, this is my job, of course, but i think that it’s pretty hilarious that most of these grammatical blunders are overlooked in football/basketball/etc but then you have the pga (or lpga?) trying to pass regulations to have all their pros speak engligh.

    then again, maybe subconsciously we are all sympathetic to football players who speak so badly because we know that they’ve all probably had multiple concussions (which are instances of traumatic brain injury that often impair speech anyway)? or at least that would make me feel better that their speech was a direct consequence of their profession rather than an unfortunate result of not HAVING to speak well to be successful.

    still funny though… sometimes watching espn sounds like going to work, haha, except everyone is a LOT older and they get paid to talk like that.

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