72 “Blissful” Days of Marriage

So here’s the thing.
I know what I’m going to say in a few paragraphs from now is going to be a bit offensive to many. I can live with that.
But let me just say something.
I understand, for the most part. Though we may not come to the same agreement, for the most part, I understand your frustrations and your fears.
I understand why gay marriage goes against everything you stand for.
I understand that you don’t want the idea of gay marriage stuffed down your throat or your children’s. I get that. Because even as a pastor, I don’t appreciate Jesus being stuffed down my throat when I’m coming out of a concert, a grocery store, a sports game, during dinner at the food court in a mall…

I understand that you don’t want your young child to come home and ask why his/her friend has two mommys/daddys.

I really do get where a lot of your questions, concerns, fears, etc are coming from. I really do.

But this is what gets me.
During the voting season, when Prop 8 (eliminating gay marriage) was a highly contested proposition, proponents of Prop 8 constantly said (at least the ones I’ve talked to) that they need to protect the sanctity of marriage. That allowing gays to marry will ruin the sacredness and the sanctity of marriage.

Fine.
But, how come nothing was ever said about how we, as heterosexuals, have undermined the sacredness of marriage?
Last night, all the friggin’ news channels had something to say about Kim Kardashian filing for divorce.
She was married for 72 days. 72. And she filed for divorce. What does that say about the sacredness of marriage?
There are some rumors floating around that the marriage was all a publicity stunt. Which makes it even worse. 72 days. Or it was a hoax. Either way, it cheapens and ruins the sacredness and the sanctity of marriage.

I read that a country somewhere (I think Mexico) is pushing for a 2 year trial period in marriage. The couple gets married, and for two years, it’s basically a non-committed marriage. Should the couple decide that marriage isn’t for them within the two years, divorce is hassle-free. Should they decide to commit, then they have a re-commitment ceremony.

And you have people like Elizabeth Taylor who has been married like 9 times.
You have Britney Spears who married then annulled in like less than two days.

Our country’s divorce rates are at 50%.
We have sites like Ashley Madison that encourages affairs. (“Life is short. Have an affair.”)
Many younger people I’ve talked to don’t even see the point of getting married, and would rather live together.
In our country, 1 out of 2 marriages will end in divorce. (I know I already said that.)

And you’re telling me that our biggest opponent for the sacredness and sanctity of marriage is allowing gays to marry?
Can’t we at least admit that we, heterosexuals, have a big part of destroying the traditional values of marriage?

All I’m really trying to say is, can’t we put the same effort of protesting gay marriages, and praying that gay marriages won’t happen, into helping those who are married?
Shouldn’t we also be in fervent prayer about the morality of our country’s heterosexuals?
Jesus never is quoted saying anything about homosexuality in the Gospels. But he has strong things to say about marriage and divorce.

A friend’s church went and protested (and prayed) for the state’s decision to allow gay marriage. They got the youth to go. The adults were passionate. And I asked my friend, “Do you guys offer anything for making marriages stronger? Do you offer any type of ministry for divorcees? Do you offer any type of ministry for people who are not in their first marriage?” The answer was no to all three things.

And I just kept thinking to myself, how much more helpful it might be if they put all that energy in helping those who are struggling in their relationships at their own very church.

But, I know that can come off as holier-than-thou. And I know not everyone thinks that way. I understand that this is a very important issue to many.
I just want someone who supports Prop 8 to admit that heterosexuals have a hand in ruining the ideas of marriages.  Kim Kardashian’s 10 Million Dollar wedding lasted only 72 days (or worse, was a publicity stunt). If that’s not a slap in the face of marriage, then I don’t see how gay marriage is.

One thought on “72 “Blissful” Days of Marriage

  1. It’s true that too many people that champion causes are poor examples, or non-examples, for that matter. I couldn’t say that it was wrong, though, for someone who was never married to have morality pangs over the issue of marriage. Nevertheless, unmarried, married, and oft married alike are polarized by this topic. Interesting too, that during the course of our country’s history, few if any secular laws were ever deemed necessary to regulate the matter of who you could marry. Yet I believe every state has long established laws about how many you can marry (thought TV shows us some still ignore them). From what I can recall of scripture, I believe it recommends that kings and religious leaders should only have one wife (a decree which Solomon beat the crap out of..), and as for the rest of us? Well, I can hardly afford the one wife I have. Sound a little bit ridiculous? So is protesting to have a right to, or to force something on, someone else that you know nothing about. Marriage is a sacred institute, yet gay and straight alike enter into it having no concept of what that means. Perhaps training should be involved, whether you want to be a spouse or a protester. Just like getting your drivers license, anybody who wants to marry, or protest a form of marriage, has to take training to know exactly what they’re talking about, and/or getting into. (Except it’s not like driving a car, but more like flying an airplane) And previous relationships, affairs, and marriages don’t count as on the job training. Then imagine the same for parenting…

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